Currently: Talking to Andrea and Richard on WLM
Currently Listening To: 'Contagious' by Avril Lavinge
Mel left for tuition before I could tell her I loved her. T.T
Well, I'll tell you now.....MEL I LOVE YOU!!!!
Bahahaha!
That sounded so gay. =B
I think most girls in SA are. NOT gay. Let me finish my sentence. I think most of us are bi. Yeeeeaaahhh.....
LOL
Nah, we just love our friends. That's not wrong! =)
Anyway....feeling totally.....wiped out. *does a surfer dude impression*
Yeah...like....totally.
LOL
I was late for school today. T.T all thanks to my parents. Gaaaaahhh......I may not be a perfectionist but I like punctuality and erm....I'm a perfectionist in my essays/stories. (:
So yes, yes, yes.....
I'm tired so don't mind if I talk crap every now and again.
English was boring today. -.-
Summary.
GAH.
Pn. Christina I want my essay back!!!!!!!! I did NOT just squeeze the blood out of my heart to write that essay just so you can stuff it in a plastic bag, bring it home and NOT grade it. T.T
Currently Listening To: 'Hot' by Avril Lavinge
Yeah, I'm pretty much in a 'Avril Lavinge' mood. Was talking about her with Sand earlier. We were talking about loads of stuff actually. Some about school T.T gah. But the others were all good. (:
FINALLY!!! Some bonding time!!!!!
Lately, I feel like there's a barrier between me and my top six best friends. Yes, I'm talking about Sandra, Divya, Melissa, Baizura, Myra and Sash.
It's just I don't know. It's like we're all drifting apart. Everyone is always busy with one thing or another and stressing about something so we hardly talk and yeah. I don't know. I feel alone. -.-
Okay, so maybe I'm being selfish. But then again, I think I have the right to 'voice out what I think' in my blog. Like I've said over and over again. Don't like what I'm talking about? Just click that little 'X' on the right side of your screen. You don't have to sit there and read my mindless rant you know.
I think Greg from CSI Las Vegas is hot. (:
I think my taekwando 'master' was PMS-ing today. He was like, in a total bad mood (or something) and he kept on saying, "I can't hear your shouts! Do push up's 10 ten times!!"
Normally, I don't mind push up's but it was only five minutes into the class and he already made us do like about 20 push up's and 20 sit up's and when he said that it was like, the third time. And yeah, my arms could barely support me.
My hair is a mess right now. I just showered and I just let it dry like, naturally and I haven't combed it yet. It looks.......'boufy'. <--- ha ha ha. Dougie's word. (: I think. I don't know. I remembered him saying something along those lines though.
Anyway, Mum is calling me down for erm....dinner. It's only 7.30pm. T.T
Gah....
History homework to finish.
Just a little bit more.
Haaaaaaaaaiiihhh.......
I want to sleep. SLEEP.
Wednesday, 20 February 2008
Tuesday, 19 February 2008
Strike A Pose and Fake A Smile
Currently: Talking to Mel on WLM
Currently Listening To: 'Sleepless Night' by Faber Drive
So today the highlight of my day was English. (: Pn. Chris sure knows how to make the class laugh. Or rather, the students + Pn. Chris. (:
Today was picture day.
For the 'candid' shot, I did a Tom Delonge pose. *ahem* I think we all know how it looks like. If you don't. Then go and Google it. (:
Lots of smileys today. (: (: (:
ANYWAY, English....
We were talking about bringing cameras to school and yadda yadda yadda. Then Pn. Christina went like, "Right......*looks around the class and then long shocked pause* I just saw a camera."
LOL
That's because the photographer guy just went past our class with his camera and yeah....it was kinda funny the way teacher just stopped talking and went like ----> O.O
Then Lydia asked me if today had triple period Science or only double period Science because I'm like the 'assistant' and every alternate week we either have extra Science or Maths as erm....extra class.
Lydia's exact words were: "Natasha, today got Science, Science, Science or Maths, Science, Science?"
Me: "Maths, Science, Science."
Lydia: "Really? *turns to Nima sitting behind her* It's Maths, Science, Science."
Nima: "Really?"
Lydia: "Yeah. *asks Pn. Christina* Teacher, today is it Maths, Science, Science or Science, Science, Science?"
Trisher: *overheard the entire conversation* "It's Maths, Science, Science."
Lydia: *turns to Nima* "See?"
Pn. Christina: *looks at me, Trisher, Lydia and Nima* "HUH?!"
LOL
(;
And then we had to do our work but while we were doing our work, Trishie went to the toilet and was suppose to pass up one of our classmate's book, Nisha, on one of the teacher's table, for her.
This was what happened....
Nisha: "Trishie....where's my book?"
Trishie: "OH MY GOD. I was suppose to put your book on teacher's table after I went to the toilet."
Nisha: "So where's my book now?"
Trishie: "I think I left it in the toilet."
I couldn't help it. I started laughing like crazy. It was just the way she said it, it reminded me of Seinfield. (:
So a few minutes after that, Nisha went to Trishie who went back to her place already.
Nisha: "Trishie, which toilet did you go to?"
Pn. Christina: "Nisha!"
Trishie: "I didn't leave it at the toilet la."
LOL
So Pn. Mary is not coming in at all this entire week for Science because she has to go with the netball team for a competition. She gave us some worksheets to do and during her time, no teacher came in. So I was sitting with Myra, Sharinee and Trisher.
Sharinee: *asks me and Myra* "You both were close to Yamuna ah last year?"
Me: *does the Science worksheet. Heard the question but unsure. And then finally understood the question* "Ha? Who? Us? Yeah. Why?" <--- all in one shot so it actually sounded like 'hawhousyeahwhy'. LOL Myra said that would make a great name for a person. Can you just imagine? "Hi! I'm hawhousyeahwhy."
Hahahaha.
Yep. Today I laughed a lot. It was just unavoidable. (:
Random fact: I like the smell of new post-It pads.
Speaking of post-It, today Trisher was obsessed with my post-It. Lol. She kept on playing with it and yeah.....and then we tried to distract her with UHU glue. Which she did take. :P But then went back to my post-It pad. So Sharinee gave her a calculator. And Trisher was obsessed with that.
Myra: "Is that MY calculator?!?"
Me & Sharinee: *laughs* "YEAH!"
LOL
Trisher was trying to spell 'BOOBLESS' on the calculator.
Hahahaha.
(:
Well that was today.
Currently Listening To: 'Sleepless Night' by Faber Drive
So today the highlight of my day was English. (: Pn. Chris sure knows how to make the class laugh. Or rather, the students + Pn. Chris. (:
Today was picture day.
For the 'candid' shot, I did a Tom Delonge pose. *ahem* I think we all know how it looks like. If you don't. Then go and Google it. (:
Lots of smileys today. (: (: (:
ANYWAY, English....
We were talking about bringing cameras to school and yadda yadda yadda. Then Pn. Christina went like, "Right......*looks around the class and then long shocked pause* I just saw a camera."
LOL
That's because the photographer guy just went past our class with his camera and yeah....it was kinda funny the way teacher just stopped talking and went like ----> O.O
Then Lydia asked me if today had triple period Science or only double period Science because I'm like the 'assistant' and every alternate week we either have extra Science or Maths as erm....extra class.
Lydia's exact words were: "Natasha, today got Science, Science, Science or Maths, Science, Science?"
Me: "Maths, Science, Science."
Lydia: "Really? *turns to Nima sitting behind her* It's Maths, Science, Science."
Nima: "Really?"
Lydia: "Yeah. *asks Pn. Christina* Teacher, today is it Maths, Science, Science or Science, Science, Science?"
Trisher: *overheard the entire conversation* "It's Maths, Science, Science."
Lydia: *turns to Nima* "See?"
Pn. Christina: *looks at me, Trisher, Lydia and Nima* "HUH?!"
LOL
(;
And then we had to do our work but while we were doing our work, Trishie went to the toilet and was suppose to pass up one of our classmate's book, Nisha, on one of the teacher's table, for her.
This was what happened....
Nisha: "Trishie....where's my book?"
Trishie: "OH MY GOD. I was suppose to put your book on teacher's table after I went to the toilet."
Nisha: "So where's my book now?"
Trishie: "I think I left it in the toilet."
I couldn't help it. I started laughing like crazy. It was just the way she said it, it reminded me of Seinfield. (:
So a few minutes after that, Nisha went to Trishie who went back to her place already.
Nisha: "Trishie, which toilet did you go to?"
Pn. Christina: "Nisha!"
Trishie: "I didn't leave it at the toilet la."
LOL
So Pn. Mary is not coming in at all this entire week for Science because she has to go with the netball team for a competition. She gave us some worksheets to do and during her time, no teacher came in. So I was sitting with Myra, Sharinee and Trisher.
Sharinee: *asks me and Myra* "You both were close to Yamuna ah last year?"
Me: *does the Science worksheet. Heard the question but unsure. And then finally understood the question* "Ha? Who? Us? Yeah. Why?" <--- all in one shot so it actually sounded like 'hawhousyeahwhy'. LOL Myra said that would make a great name for a person. Can you just imagine? "Hi! I'm hawhousyeahwhy."
Hahahaha.
Yep. Today I laughed a lot. It was just unavoidable. (:
Random fact: I like the smell of new post-It pads.
Speaking of post-It, today Trisher was obsessed with my post-It. Lol. She kept on playing with it and yeah.....and then we tried to distract her with UHU glue. Which she did take. :P But then went back to my post-It pad. So Sharinee gave her a calculator. And Trisher was obsessed with that.
Myra: "Is that MY calculator?!?"
Me & Sharinee: *laughs* "YEAH!"
LOL
Trisher was trying to spell 'BOOBLESS' on the calculator.
Hahahaha.
(:
Well that was today.
Monday, 18 February 2008
Pictures of.....ME!!
Faber.
Faber.
Faber.
"FABER.....!!!! DRIVE!!!!" (:
*credits to Myra for the inspiration she has given me*
They are not 'glow in the dark'. That would just be freaky.
.jpg)
Hah. Was feeling emo.
.jpg)
Taken today, about six something. At Puchong.
Something to get you through the week when I can't be online. (:OHMYGODIAMONDSTERLINGRENADE!!!!
Currently: MySpacing
Currently Listening To: 'Kiss Kiss' by Chris Brown (oh, yes, I'mma in a dance mood!!! (:)
OHMYGODIAMONDSTERLINGRENADE!!!!!
*points above*
My new fav word. Cos there are tons of people saying, 'Oh My God!' these days....I'm just going to say tht from now on. Not that it make sense but whatever!
I'm going to tell you about something that made me say that out loud and said, "SHIT, SHIT, SHEEEEEIT!!!!!" several times.
Hang on tight yeah people?
Cos the news shocked me like crazy.
Right.....so if you're a keen observer.....you'll see at the side of my blog, I have links to some of my friend's blogs. Myra's one just made me scream all the above things.
Why?
ALBERT IS IN HER TUITION!!!!!
O.O
O.O
O.O
O.O
The sleepiness I had earlier is now instantly gone. Who says they need caffeine to avoid drowsiness.....reading blogs are insta-mood enhancers! (:
Okay, that sounded wrong. It sounded like I've been pumping cocaine or something. -.-'
NO THANK YOU.
Moving on from the shocking news......
Monday
As per usual, Monday brings along my usual 'I hate Monday' mood. It was kind of stupid since I was happily dreaming about McFly when my alarm rang and woke me up at 5.45am ('Sorrow' by Box Car Racer is my alarm tone at the moment (:). Stumbled out of bed, showered, brushed my teeth, stuffed my books into the bag and slopped of downstairs. I don't think my eyes were properly open until I reached school and was sitting in my class tying my shoe laces.
HA HA HA.
Lame right?
Anyway, had morning assembly today. Sat with Sandra and Myra. (:
Was sitting with Myra when Sandra popped out of no where and sat beside Myra. I got up and sat on Sandra's other side (easy access to talk!). Myra looked sort of blurr in the morning but I don't blame her. We had a lot of homework to pass up today and I think most of us to be perfectly honest, only finished about the last minute before the teacher asked us to pass it up.
^.^
The typical lifestyles of a teenager I would like to say. <-- Ha ha ha. I sound like a 45 year old woman. :P
Currently Listening To: 'Gimme That' by Chris Brown
No. There's no pattern forming. I just think Chris Brown's song are good to dance too. I'm in a dancing mood as I've mentioned before. Anyway, after assembly we had BM. Have I mentioned to you how useless I am in this? I know. It's my own language. But I'm not going to lie about it, I suck at it! Honestly, I'm a hell lot more fluent in English and I like it that way. Some strange feeling in me says I'm probably gonna get 7A's and 1B for my PMR. What's the 'B'?
BM.
-.-'
BM shall be my downfall.
Grrrrr......
Then we had Civic. The subject that probably no one ever listens to. Most of it is common sense anyway. Why are we learning Civic when there are people like 'S' living?
Currently Listening To: 'Blood, Sweat and Tears' by V (another mood enhancer!)
*imitates Dougie during the McFly Greatest Hits DVD Extra Footage miming along to this song*
BAHAHAHAHA.
I love yoooooooooou Dougie. (:
So during recess, Divya was somewhere in the library. -.-
Hung out with Melissa and Sandra. We were talking about......*ahem* yesterday.
O.O
Bloody Hell. Speak of the devil.
Melissa just came online on Windows Live Messenger.
O.o
Eh, freaky.
Currently Listening To: 'Drops of Jupiter' by Train
After recess was Maths, I felt so sleepy when teacher was explaining the things on the board. I honestly don't get circles anymore. I feel so stupid. -.-'
But that didn't stop me from going, "Mye....do you think teacher would notice if I slept like, right now?"
Myra: *laughs* "I donno."
With that slang of her's when she says 'don't know'. It was Geo after that. And then finally Agama. That's when Nadzirah came into our class (because we join with another class for Agama) and she was pointing at my braces.
Nadzirah: "Eeehhh.....are those glow in the dark?"
Me: O.O "Huh? No."
Nadzirah: "Oh okay."
Seriously. That's the second time someone has asked me that! First it was Melissa, and now her. -.-'
I knew green would be a wrong colour for my braces. That's it. I'm picking orange the next time around.
Currently Listening To: 'Killin' Me' By Faber Drive
Oh how you've gotten me addicted to Mr. Faber Myra. (:
Yes you're right. I will never get into the car with Faber. He's crazy. o.o
But hot.
HEY! It's bad enough I have to trust DOUGIE behind the wheels. I shall quote, "It's like trusting a kid with a shotgun."
And then now there's Faber who plays the guitar while he drives. I've got to say, I'm tempted to do that when I get my license. But it'll end up with them revoking my license. -.-'
Currently Listening To: 'Summer Fades to Fall' by Faber Drive
Well that was basically my day. Now I'm off to find for the pictures for my woodwork project. And erm.....generally being online. (:
P/s: Myra, were you talking to me when you said what you said at the end of your blog? Hit me back with your answer yeah? (:
Currently Listening To: 'Kiss Kiss' by Chris Brown (oh, yes, I'mma in a dance mood!!! (:)
OHMYGODIAMONDSTERLINGRENADE!!!!!
*points above*
My new fav word. Cos there are tons of people saying, 'Oh My God!' these days....I'm just going to say tht from now on. Not that it make sense but whatever!
I'm going to tell you about something that made me say that out loud and said, "SHIT, SHIT, SHEEEEEIT!!!!!" several times.
Hang on tight yeah people?
Cos the news shocked me like crazy.
Right.....so if you're a keen observer.....you'll see at the side of my blog, I have links to some of my friend's blogs. Myra's one just made me scream all the above things.
Why?
ALBERT IS IN HER TUITION!!!!!
O.O
O.O
O.O
O.O
OHMYGODIAMONDSTERLINGRENADE SHEEEEEEEEIT!!!!!
The sleepiness I had earlier is now instantly gone. Who says they need caffeine to avoid drowsiness.....reading blogs are insta-mood enhancers! (:
Okay, that sounded wrong. It sounded like I've been pumping cocaine or something. -.-'
NO THANK YOU.
Moving on from the shocking news......
Monday
As per usual, Monday brings along my usual 'I hate Monday' mood. It was kind of stupid since I was happily dreaming about McFly when my alarm rang and woke me up at 5.45am ('Sorrow' by Box Car Racer is my alarm tone at the moment (:). Stumbled out of bed, showered, brushed my teeth, stuffed my books into the bag and slopped of downstairs. I don't think my eyes were properly open until I reached school and was sitting in my class tying my shoe laces.
HA HA HA.
Lame right?
Anyway, had morning assembly today. Sat with Sandra and Myra. (:
Was sitting with Myra when Sandra popped out of no where and sat beside Myra. I got up and sat on Sandra's other side (easy access to talk!). Myra looked sort of blurr in the morning but I don't blame her. We had a lot of homework to pass up today and I think most of us to be perfectly honest, only finished about the last minute before the teacher asked us to pass it up.
^.^
The typical lifestyles of a teenager I would like to say. <-- Ha ha ha. I sound like a 45 year old woman. :P
Currently Listening To: 'Gimme That' by Chris Brown
No. There's no pattern forming. I just think Chris Brown's song are good to dance too. I'm in a dancing mood as I've mentioned before. Anyway, after assembly we had BM. Have I mentioned to you how useless I am in this? I know. It's my own language. But I'm not going to lie about it, I suck at it! Honestly, I'm a hell lot more fluent in English and I like it that way. Some strange feeling in me says I'm probably gonna get 7A's and 1B for my PMR. What's the 'B'?
BM.
-.-'
BM shall be my downfall.
Grrrrr......
Then we had Civic. The subject that probably no one ever listens to. Most of it is common sense anyway. Why are we learning Civic when there are people like 'S' living?
Currently Listening To: 'Blood, Sweat and Tears' by V (another mood enhancer!)
*imitates Dougie during the McFly Greatest Hits DVD Extra Footage miming along to this song*
BAHAHAHAHA.
I love yoooooooooou Dougie. (:
So during recess, Divya was somewhere in the library. -.-
Hung out with Melissa and Sandra. We were talking about......*ahem* yesterday.
O.O
Bloody Hell. Speak of the devil.
Melissa just came online on Windows Live Messenger.
O.o
Eh, freaky.
Currently Listening To: 'Drops of Jupiter' by Train
After recess was Maths, I felt so sleepy when teacher was explaining the things on the board. I honestly don't get circles anymore. I feel so stupid. -.-'
But that didn't stop me from going, "Mye....do you think teacher would notice if I slept like, right now?"
Myra: *laughs* "I donno."
With that slang of her's when she says 'don't know'. It was Geo after that. And then finally Agama. That's when Nadzirah came into our class (because we join with another class for Agama) and she was pointing at my braces.
Nadzirah: "Eeehhh.....are those glow in the dark?"
Me: O.O "Huh? No."
Nadzirah: "Oh okay."
Seriously. That's the second time someone has asked me that! First it was Melissa, and now her. -.-'
I knew green would be a wrong colour for my braces. That's it. I'm picking orange the next time around.
Currently Listening To: 'Killin' Me' By Faber Drive
Oh how you've gotten me addicted to Mr. Faber Myra. (:
Yes you're right. I will never get into the car with Faber. He's crazy. o.o
But hot.
HEY! It's bad enough I have to trust DOUGIE behind the wheels. I shall quote, "It's like trusting a kid with a shotgun."
And then now there's Faber who plays the guitar while he drives. I've got to say, I'm tempted to do that when I get my license. But it'll end up with them revoking my license. -.-'
Currently Listening To: 'Summer Fades to Fall' by Faber Drive
Well that was basically my day. Now I'm off to find for the pictures for my woodwork project. And erm.....generally being online. (:
Put yourself in her position
All she needs is recognition
Love's not enough when you say it
Don't you know you've gotta mean it
Screwin up the best thing ever
Is something you'll regret forever
Take her and make sure she feels it
Let her know you'll never let her go
P/s: Myra, were you talking to me when you said what you said at the end of your blog? Hit me back with your answer yeah? (:
Sunday, 17 February 2008
I Show You No Emotion -...
- don't let you see what you're doing to me.
Currently Listening To: 'Sleepless Nights' by Faber Drive
The last fourteen years or so.....I always thought I was happy. Or at least, had some happiness. I didn't believe in 'artificial happiness'. Now I realize, all I had was artificial happiness. I think the last time I was truly happy was when I was nine.
So that's still.....5 years of nothingness?
Yeah pretty much.
Warning: This is going to be a pretty emo post. So if you hate it, by all means, click on the little 'X' on the right side of your screen.
Now that I got that out of the way. Why my emoness?
Why the bad mood?
Why I cut myself?
Hah....okay, so the last question might have a never ending list of answers. Let's just answer the two.
*looks outside*
It's raining.
No thunder please.
So....what's gotten me in this......state.
Currently Listening To: 'Tongue Tied' by Faber Drive
It all began when I was leaving for tuition. Well not technically but yeah, I'm just going to begin there.
I was feeling sort of nervous since Miss Nirmala said it's going to be a new teacher and all that, and of course I wanted to make a good impression by ariving to class on time. But of course all sense of punctuality is wasted on my parents. T.T
Was nearly late but I ran up the stairs like a mad loony and guess who I met at the stairs?
Our 'old' Geography teacher (when I say old, I don't mean age-wise....just you know, the previous Geo teacher that was supposed to be sacked) as bewildered as I was, I just smiled at him and said, "Hi teacher."
And went to class.
If you had read my previous post, you know that next weekend I'll be attending this seminar thing so I won't be able to go for tuition, so in my head, I wanted today to be something.....I don't know.....something worth remembering. Something that can put me in a good mood for the next two weeks until I return to tuition again. Yes, I actually like Nirmala's Tuition Centre but I'm guessing it's because of some......one.
Currently Listening To: 'If You're Not The One' by Daniel Beddingfield
So yes, anyway, I went into class and Bai had already saved me a seat at the front row. My heart leapt in my chest (yeah, what an awful cliche but it's the closest thing to describe what had happened) when I saw that HE was sitting on the same row. I think we all know who I'm talking about, yeah?
Anyway, I sat and of course began stressing about the fact that I haven't finished a lot of homework all due tomorrow. There's this girl, the one that said she doesn't trust Albert anymore, I shall name her 'S' in this post because I really don't want to have some lame arguement in school later. Writing in my blog isn't as safe as I thought it was. Not anymore.
Anyway, S, was sitting not directly behind me but on the second row. I could feel the tension in the air.
I forgot how the real conversation went (honestly, after all the crying and the pain, I really can't remember all the details), but I remembered telling Albert that there was a story going on about him and this other girl in our school (one of his ex-schoolmate's). I didn't want to tell him at first, but then of course, he had to say, "Natasha, for friendship's sake, just tell me straight out what's going on."
So I told.
And that's where it all truly began.......
He began to change place, sitting closer and closer to 'S'. I could hear them discussing about the 'story' because it was 'S' who told the girl in our school about us knowing Albert anyway. I know, I know, this is getting really complicated and confusing, I'm sorry. But I really don't want to post up the entire story online because......I don't know.
I'm sick of getting hurt okay?
Let's leave it at that.
Anyway, he was telling her the 'real story'. 'S', I can tell in her voice (I'm not sure if Albert could) still did not believe him even though she said, "No, no. It's alright. I understand."
Currently Listening To: 'Letters To God' by Box Car Racer
I hate it when people do that. It's just so.....patronizing. It's crap.
Moving on, I think my name got mentioned several times. I think. I'm not sure.
Jealousy is a crappy emotion I would like to state.
Baizura wasn't in a good mood.
So basically, I was left on my own. No one to talk to and all that because Albert went and abandoned us to sit with 'S'. Yeah. He was sitting next to her.
That's when jealousy slowly began to fill my veins.
And then there was laughter.
There was talk until it disrupt the entire class.
You know what?
Yeah, I'll admit it. I AM a jealous bitch.
But you know.....I wanted the day to go well for me. I wanted to make some memories to carry with me as a sort of.....talisman for the next two weeks.
But what did I get instead?
One totally PMS-ing best friend and a crush that was laughing and talking with his friends and 'S'.
What was I left with?
Listening to that teacher?
I did.
But 'S's voice was so freaking damn loud and she kept asking the STUPIDEST and DUMBEST questions ever in class. Like, "Teacher, does kawasan lallang have a lot of lallang?"
In translation: "Teacher, does the lalang area have a lot of lalang?"
T.T
WELL OBVIOUSLY, THE NAME KIND OF STATES IT DON'T YOU THINK?!?
And some other stupid questions that makes me want to throw the freaking book at her face and shout, "READ THAT LA YOU DUMB ASS!!!"
So yeah pissed+alone+jealous= shaking in anger and unwanted tears
Daniel (he sat in Albert's place since Albert was sitting in his place next to 'S'), noticed that I wasn't acting myself (at least someone noticed), that I was writing poems instead of listening to teacher, that I was gripping my pen in a way that I wanted to crush it in my palm if I could.
He told Albert.
Albert, from the corner of my eye, I could see was looking at me and then out of no where, he touched my arm. I was like.....'whahah?' in my head. In reality, I just ignored him. And then teacher went, "Why Albert are you disturbing her now?"
"Nothing sir, I just like her shirt."
That would have got me laughing if I wasn't too pissed off at the moment.
And then 'S' began to annoyingly poke me over and over again with her pen.
I turned to her and asked, "What?!"
Then just turned back to face teacher.
She continued to poke me again and again.
I just got so fed up and told her to stop it.
And then she went, "Oookkaaaay."
T.T
Fuck off. Just fuck off.
So yeah, class was ending. Albert came and sat at his original place and then asked me what was wrong. I told him I was fine.
"You sure? You look so sad."
So I just repeated what I said. Although I looked away after that, looking into his eyes made me want to cry for some reason. T.T
Stupid person. Why do you have to get me so freaking in love with you? GOD.
Couldn't you have done this to someone else?
Grrrr.....
I left as soon as teacher dismissed us. Of course I didn't bother to wait for Bai. What was the point? She was in a bad mood too. So I just left. Went down the stairs, got into the car. And left.
So much for a memorable day.
Currently Listening To: 'Sleepless Nights' by Faber Drive
The last fourteen years or so.....I always thought I was happy. Or at least, had some happiness. I didn't believe in 'artificial happiness'. Now I realize, all I had was artificial happiness. I think the last time I was truly happy was when I was nine.
So that's still.....5 years of nothingness?
Yeah pretty much.
Warning: This is going to be a pretty emo post. So if you hate it, by all means, click on the little 'X' on the right side of your screen.
Now that I got that out of the way. Why my emoness?
Why the bad mood?
Why I cut myself?
Hah....okay, so the last question might have a never ending list of answers. Let's just answer the two.
*looks outside*
It's raining.
No thunder please.
So....what's gotten me in this......state.
Currently Listening To: 'Tongue Tied' by Faber Drive
It all began when I was leaving for tuition. Well not technically but yeah, I'm just going to begin there.
I was feeling sort of nervous since Miss Nirmala said it's going to be a new teacher and all that, and of course I wanted to make a good impression by ariving to class on time. But of course all sense of punctuality is wasted on my parents. T.T
Was nearly late but I ran up the stairs like a mad loony and guess who I met at the stairs?
Our 'old' Geography teacher (when I say old, I don't mean age-wise....just you know, the previous Geo teacher that was supposed to be sacked) as bewildered as I was, I just smiled at him and said, "Hi teacher."
And went to class.
If you had read my previous post, you know that next weekend I'll be attending this seminar thing so I won't be able to go for tuition, so in my head, I wanted today to be something.....I don't know.....something worth remembering. Something that can put me in a good mood for the next two weeks until I return to tuition again. Yes, I actually like Nirmala's Tuition Centre but I'm guessing it's because of some......one.
Currently Listening To: 'If You're Not The One' by Daniel Beddingfield
So yes, anyway, I went into class and Bai had already saved me a seat at the front row. My heart leapt in my chest (yeah, what an awful cliche but it's the closest thing to describe what had happened) when I saw that HE was sitting on the same row. I think we all know who I'm talking about, yeah?
Anyway, I sat and of course began stressing about the fact that I haven't finished a lot of homework all due tomorrow. There's this girl, the one that said she doesn't trust Albert anymore, I shall name her 'S' in this post because I really don't want to have some lame arguement in school later. Writing in my blog isn't as safe as I thought it was. Not anymore.
Anyway, S, was sitting not directly behind me but on the second row. I could feel the tension in the air.
I forgot how the real conversation went (honestly, after all the crying and the pain, I really can't remember all the details), but I remembered telling Albert that there was a story going on about him and this other girl in our school (one of his ex-schoolmate's). I didn't want to tell him at first, but then of course, he had to say, "Natasha, for friendship's sake, just tell me straight out what's going on."
So I told.
And that's where it all truly began.......
He began to change place, sitting closer and closer to 'S'. I could hear them discussing about the 'story' because it was 'S' who told the girl in our school about us knowing Albert anyway. I know, I know, this is getting really complicated and confusing, I'm sorry. But I really don't want to post up the entire story online because......I don't know.
I'm sick of getting hurt okay?
Let's leave it at that.
Anyway, he was telling her the 'real story'. 'S', I can tell in her voice (I'm not sure if Albert could) still did not believe him even though she said, "No, no. It's alright. I understand."
Currently Listening To: 'Letters To God' by Box Car Racer
I hate it when people do that. It's just so.....patronizing. It's crap.
Moving on, I think my name got mentioned several times. I think. I'm not sure.
Jealousy is a crappy emotion I would like to state.
Baizura wasn't in a good mood.
So basically, I was left on my own. No one to talk to and all that because Albert went and abandoned us to sit with 'S'. Yeah. He was sitting next to her.
That's when jealousy slowly began to fill my veins.
And then there was laughter.
There was talk until it disrupt the entire class.
You know what?
Yeah, I'll admit it. I AM a jealous bitch.
But you know.....I wanted the day to go well for me. I wanted to make some memories to carry with me as a sort of.....talisman for the next two weeks.
But what did I get instead?
One totally PMS-ing best friend and a crush that was laughing and talking with his friends and 'S'.
What was I left with?
Listening to that teacher?
I did.
But 'S's voice was so freaking damn loud and she kept asking the STUPIDEST and DUMBEST questions ever in class. Like, "Teacher, does kawasan lallang have a lot of lallang?"
In translation: "Teacher, does the lalang area have a lot of lalang?"
T.T
WELL OBVIOUSLY, THE NAME KIND OF STATES IT DON'T YOU THINK?!?
And some other stupid questions that makes me want to throw the freaking book at her face and shout, "READ THAT LA YOU DUMB ASS!!!"
So yeah pissed+alone+jealous= shaking in anger and unwanted tears
Daniel (he sat in Albert's place since Albert was sitting in his place next to 'S'), noticed that I wasn't acting myself (at least someone noticed), that I was writing poems instead of listening to teacher, that I was gripping my pen in a way that I wanted to crush it in my palm if I could.
He told Albert.
Albert, from the corner of my eye, I could see was looking at me and then out of no where, he touched my arm. I was like.....'whahah?' in my head. In reality, I just ignored him. And then teacher went, "Why Albert are you disturbing her now?"
"Nothing sir, I just like her shirt."
That would have got me laughing if I wasn't too pissed off at the moment.
And then 'S' began to annoyingly poke me over and over again with her pen.
I turned to her and asked, "What?!"
Then just turned back to face teacher.
She continued to poke me again and again.
I just got so fed up and told her to stop it.
And then she went, "Oookkaaaay."
T.T
Fuck off. Just fuck off.
So yeah, class was ending. Albert came and sat at his original place and then asked me what was wrong. I told him I was fine.
"You sure? You look so sad."
So I just repeated what I said. Although I looked away after that, looking into his eyes made me want to cry for some reason. T.T
Stupid person. Why do you have to get me so freaking in love with you? GOD.
Couldn't you have done this to someone else?
Grrrr.....
I left as soon as teacher dismissed us. Of course I didn't bother to wait for Bai. What was the point? She was in a bad mood too. So I just left. Went down the stairs, got into the car. And left.
So much for a memorable day.
Saturday, 16 February 2008
Staring O.O
Currently Listening to: 'Breaking' by Elliot Minor (:
My iStalk strikes again! Okay, I wasn't really on the prowl for pictures today. It was just a coincidence. Plus, it just looked super cute, I had to make that part of the day 'immortal'.
HA HA HA.
ARGH! SO CUTE! (:
My iStalk strikes again! Okay, I wasn't really on the prowl for pictures today. It was just a coincidence. Plus, it just looked super cute, I had to make that part of the day 'immortal'.
HA HA HA.
ARGH! SO CUTE! (:Currently Listening To: 'Seeing Red' by Unwritten Law.
I am a mean person. I realized that. :P
But look at it! Plus, I like his baju clothes today. <--- Ha ha ha. My Malay-ness has gotten to me. FINALLY. I needed to be somewhat 'Malaysian'. Because it annoys me when people think I'm not from this country. HELLO? Do you think I WANT to be born here if I had the choice? But oh well. It's a place to call 'home', I guess. LOL.
Made me remember of a time when we were learning History and Albert said, "The Japanese will die for their country. Malaysians will run for their country."
(;
Funneh.
Currently Listening To: 'Tongue Tied' by Faber Drive
I am so addicted to this song now! Thanks to Myra and Sash! (:
Ohmygod.....they'll be learning 'Reproduction' for the next class. T.T AND I've got this stupid Motivation Seminar crap so I can't be there!!!!!
T.T
Damn it.
Damn it.
Damn it.
DAMN IT.
Gah. Bloody hell. And I was so looking forward to learn that in class. MAN....that means I shall learn about stupid PLANT REPRODUCTION the next time. Grrrr.....oh God, please Nirmala give an assesment for next lesson!!!!! I SO WANT TO BE THERE FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER!!!!
Currently Listening To: '24 Story Love Affair' by Faber Drive
This song so reminds me of my 'situation' right now. Not that I have a situation. I think he likes Bai anyway. I don't know. He just seems to be more closer to her today. And yeah, obviously I felt left out. So I kept pestering Sharinee who sat next to me.
And then once again, Mr. Sara seems to ignore me when I answer questions and when someone overhears me say the answer, he'll say it, and get the praises and compliments.
T.T
I should just shut up in classes. Seriously......talk about annoying. And then Bai will rub my back.
Currently Listening To: 'There Is' by Box Car Racer
Oh yes, yes, yes. This song. (: Tom Delonge. *sighs* It's funny how Albert does not know him. Haizzz....
I should stop talking about Albert. Talk about erm....obsessed?
Like I said before, I guess he only has eyes for Bai. I should just keep quiet and back off. As per usual. Tom should flip this song around so that it's from a girl's POV (point of view for those who didn't get the short form).
Hmmm...haaa....not sure what to write about anymore. I thought I had something in mind. But apparently I don't. Well anyway, I wanna go write something of erm.....a story. Not sure if I'll have time to blog tomorrow. Shit loads of homework for school that I have not finished. T.T
We'll see how it ends up.
Thursday, 14 February 2008
I Apologise For Nothing
Currently Listening To: 'We Apologise For Nothing' by Fightstar (sorry Mye but I think I'm more of a 'Fightstar fan' than I am an 'Elliot Minor fan'. I still think they're awesome though (:)
I'm going to bring this issue up because it has been bugging the hell out of me ever since I found out like, yesterday? It doesn't really matter.
Anyway, what I want to say is, everyone has their murky past. EVERYONE has a skeleton in their closet that they aren't willing to show anyone. Maybe even more than one skeleton. So why are you being so biased and judging someone for something they did a long time ago? Okay, maybe it has only been two, three years but.....still.
We know this person has changed. Why are you judging him about the past?
We have prove that he's turn over a new leaf. He's a nice guy now. A really great friend. True, I have no say in what you think of him or whatever but you know.....give the guy a chance. What if it had happened to you? What he did was wrong. I know. But he was still a kid. Do you think he'd do it now? We've grown.......we've matured. We've shed whatever injudicious ways we used to have and well, became us.
How sure are you that the other party isn't lying anyway? You've heard the things circulating around her. You know the way she acts. Check the facts.
So what if I'm defending him?
It doesn't necessarily mean I have 'feelings' for him.
Okay, so I do. A tiny bit.
But even if I didn't, I'd still defend him. Because I'm a good friend. He's a good person inside. He might not be back then. But he is who he is now. Like Sash's wise words state: "Forget the past. And continue on with the future."
Currently Listening To: 'Tongue Tied' by Faber Drive
It just frustrates me that people still judge other people based on what had happened in the past. Hey, I'm not as perfect either you know. And I know you aren't either. I've had my share of bad memories. I've got things that I wish I could erase. I've got things that I wish I had never said. I've got things I wish that if I had the chance, I could go back in time and warned myself.
But you know what? I can't.
I've made the mistakes, gone through the consequences. What's the point of digging up the past which I've already buried?
Currently Listening To: 'Obvious' by Faber Drive
I know, maybe I'm making a really unnecessary big deal out of this but it annoys the hell out of me and I just needed to let it out somewhere. Actually, this song is kinda reflecting on the point.
Grrrr.....
The whole incident is replaying in my head over and over again and it's just making me feel even more pissed off.
Currently Listening To: 'When I'm With You' by Faber Drive
Why am I pretty sure that by this Saturday.....a couple of rumours might've already began to spread about this whole thing?
-.-
Get a life you bitches.
So I'm on his side instead of your's.
He's changed.
You clearly haven't.
The exit door is on your left by the way. Be sure the door doesn't hit you on the ass on your way out.
Currently Listening To: '24 Story Love Affair' by Faber Drive
Dear Readers,
Happy Valentines day. (:
Sorry for the really angry post but I needed to get it off my chest before I was crushed. And before this Saturday comes. o.o
I'm going to bring this issue up because it has been bugging the hell out of me ever since I found out like, yesterday? It doesn't really matter.
Anyway, what I want to say is, everyone has their murky past. EVERYONE has a skeleton in their closet that they aren't willing to show anyone. Maybe even more than one skeleton. So why are you being so biased and judging someone for something they did a long time ago? Okay, maybe it has only been two, three years but.....still.
We know this person has changed. Why are you judging him about the past?
We have prove that he's turn over a new leaf. He's a nice guy now. A really great friend. True, I have no say in what you think of him or whatever but you know.....give the guy a chance. What if it had happened to you? What he did was wrong. I know. But he was still a kid. Do you think he'd do it now? We've grown.......we've matured. We've shed whatever injudicious ways we used to have and well, became us.
How sure are you that the other party isn't lying anyway? You've heard the things circulating around her. You know the way she acts. Check the facts.
So what if I'm defending him?
It doesn't necessarily mean I have 'feelings' for him.
Okay, so I do. A tiny bit.
But even if I didn't, I'd still defend him. Because I'm a good friend. He's a good person inside. He might not be back then. But he is who he is now. Like Sash's wise words state: "Forget the past. And continue on with the future."
Currently Listening To: 'Tongue Tied' by Faber Drive
It just frustrates me that people still judge other people based on what had happened in the past. Hey, I'm not as perfect either you know. And I know you aren't either. I've had my share of bad memories. I've got things that I wish I could erase. I've got things that I wish I had never said. I've got things I wish that if I had the chance, I could go back in time and warned myself.
But you know what? I can't.
I've made the mistakes, gone through the consequences. What's the point of digging up the past which I've already buried?
Currently Listening To: 'Obvious' by Faber Drive
I know, maybe I'm making a really unnecessary big deal out of this but it annoys the hell out of me and I just needed to let it out somewhere. Actually, this song is kinda reflecting on the point.
They judge, by the way he looks (Woah)
The cover's not quite like the book
He's just, so misunderstood (Woah, woah woah)
Grrrr.....
The whole incident is replaying in my head over and over again and it's just making me feel even more pissed off.
Currently Listening To: 'When I'm With You' by Faber Drive
Why am I pretty sure that by this Saturday.....a couple of rumours might've already began to spread about this whole thing?
-.-
Get a life you bitches.
So I'm on his side instead of your's.
He's changed.
You clearly haven't.
The exit door is on your left by the way. Be sure the door doesn't hit you on the ass on your way out.
Currently Listening To: '24 Story Love Affair' by Faber Drive
Dear Readers,
Happy Valentines day. (:
Sorry for the really angry post but I needed to get it off my chest before I was crushed. And before this Saturday comes. o.o
When I met you
You told me
To forget you
Your way out of my league
But it happened
A break through
A disaster was ready to be unleashed
Look out, look out, look out, look out
I'm crashin'
Look out, look out, look out, look out
Two worlds collide again
Sunday, 10 February 2008
There's That Smile Again
Currently listening to: 'Studying Politics' by Emery
M youngest sister is crying her lungs out. For reasons I know not of. It's annoying. It's iritating.
I'm an insensitive sister.
I know.
But currently dealing with my own problems. I'm sorry but in cases like this, I think I come first. I think. I don't know anymore. And I really cannot care less. Why? I have no idea. Am I making sense? No.
Wanna know why?
You know what it's like to get bitten once. And how much it hurts. And how much you want the pain to go away. It takes ages to recover. Depending on how hurt you are. Let's say, this is to the max. You're hurting. You feel like your heart is going to break with just a little step. And then......you're fine. You're alright albeit still tender. Still hurting, but it's managable. You can still smile. You can still laugh. You're a little scared but you're still you.
So what happens?
When the same thing happens again?
Just when you thought you were safe. Just as you were learning to walk again. Someone comes and pushes you back down all over again.
That saying, 'try and try again' is bullshit. Complete bullshit.
To the author to that quote: You have no idea, do you? Living in that perfect world of your's. Of course not. What would you know? To you, all the world is a garden of roses. But every rose has a thorn. And with every thorn.....there's always someone getting screwed over.
But of course, there are those truly unfortunate ones. The people that just get used over and over again. The people that gets pushed down until their knees are practically bones. The blood and flesh scraped away.
It sucks doesn't it?
And of course the general response to that will be, "It's life. Just face it."
Well screw you.
Why don't those people who always do the pushing and using, ever fall down? Ever get used?
It's never them is it?
Basically what I'm trying to say in this post.
You want to claim that Dougie is your's?
Go ahead. He was never mine. He's a free man. But if you want to think in that tiny little mind of your's that he is 'your's so to say. Then that is up to you. I'm just merely saying, he is his own self. Just another human trying to get through life on Earth.
You want to get branded T-shirts/sweatshirts for yourself and for your friend?
Go ahead. It doesn't matter what I think now does it? It doesn't matter. It never matters.
You want to take guitar up just because the guy you're 'in love with' is?
Go ahead.
You want to use me again and again?
Go ahead.
You want to make sure that I will forever never EVER be an equal to you?
Go ahead.
You want to push me over and over until I am no more?
Go ahead.
M youngest sister is crying her lungs out. For reasons I know not of. It's annoying. It's iritating.
I'm an insensitive sister.
I know.
But currently dealing with my own problems. I'm sorry but in cases like this, I think I come first. I think. I don't know anymore. And I really cannot care less. Why? I have no idea. Am I making sense? No.
Wanna know why?
You know what it's like to get bitten once. And how much it hurts. And how much you want the pain to go away. It takes ages to recover. Depending on how hurt you are. Let's say, this is to the max. You're hurting. You feel like your heart is going to break with just a little step. And then......you're fine. You're alright albeit still tender. Still hurting, but it's managable. You can still smile. You can still laugh. You're a little scared but you're still you.
So what happens?
When the same thing happens again?
Just when you thought you were safe. Just as you were learning to walk again. Someone comes and pushes you back down all over again.
That saying, 'try and try again' is bullshit. Complete bullshit.
To the author to that quote: You have no idea, do you? Living in that perfect world of your's. Of course not. What would you know? To you, all the world is a garden of roses. But every rose has a thorn. And with every thorn.....there's always someone getting screwed over.
But of course, there are those truly unfortunate ones. The people that just get used over and over again. The people that gets pushed down until their knees are practically bones. The blood and flesh scraped away.
It sucks doesn't it?
And of course the general response to that will be, "It's life. Just face it."
Well screw you.
Why don't those people who always do the pushing and using, ever fall down? Ever get used?
It's never them is it?
Basically what I'm trying to say in this post.
You want to claim that Dougie is your's?
Go ahead. He was never mine. He's a free man. But if you want to think in that tiny little mind of your's that he is 'your's so to say. Then that is up to you. I'm just merely saying, he is his own self. Just another human trying to get through life on Earth.
You want to get branded T-shirts/sweatshirts for yourself and for your friend?
Go ahead. It doesn't matter what I think now does it? It doesn't matter. It never matters.
You want to take guitar up just because the guy you're 'in love with' is?
Go ahead.
You want to use me again and again?
Go ahead.
You want to make sure that I will forever never EVER be an equal to you?
Go ahead.
You want to push me over and over until I am no more?
Go ahead.
One day, the tables will turn and I'll just stand and laugh.
Saturday, 9 February 2008
Oh my...WHEE!!!
Currently: MySpacing and chatting with Sash, Mel and Chee Hoe on WLM.
.jpg)
Yeah. Side profile of Albert's head! *laughs* He was checking out my watch. Look at the intent look on his face. (:
Baizura told Albert I took his picture (when we went downstairs) and he shot me this look --> T.T
Hey! I would've asked nicely but YOU kept turning away. :P
Besides....it's for a great cause. Now Mel, Sand, Div, Sash and Mye would have something to imagine as I continue my rant about Albert. :)
So yeah, my day.....
Well, I woke up damn early cos my mum woke me up and told me that we were going to my Grandma's house. I was still half-asleep so I just nodded away like an extra for the show 'Noddy'. After a visit to my Grandmum's.....
Of course it was tuition time.
Miss Nirmala gave us an exam for maths and then for Science we were learning about excretion. Oh dammit. I really can't imagine what the class would be like when we're learning about reproduction. -.-'
Miss Nirmala told us that cancer is sort of inherited. Like if you're a girl, you'd inherit it from your dad's side (if any of his side had cancer before) but if you're a guy, you'd inherit it from your mum's side.
Apparently diabetic is also inherit-able. <--- was that even a real word?
So yeah, then Albert raised his hand and said, "Teacher, that means I'm really actually diabetic, I suffer from high colestrol and *I honestly forgot what the last one was*". Why I forgot? Because at that precise moment I burst out laughing. Not to offend Albert or anything okay. I wasn't laughing because of his condition. I think that's what most people thought. o.o
How lame. -.-'
I was laughing because the way he said it, he sounded like a 45 year old man trapped in a body of a 15 year old.
Yeah and then in History for some reason....we ended up talking about Sharlinie and Nurrin. And all these kids abduction. And why people are abducting people....and so on. It was kind of funny because when Albert brought Nurrin up, Mr. Sara was like, "Okay. How did we end up talking about this when we're suppose to talk about the Communist?"
Which was sort of true. And sort of sad. I mean, I don't know. I feel a twinge of sadness everytime someone talks about Nurrin. I guess it's because she was so young and so brutally murdered. -.-
I hope the person that committed the crime burns and dies in Hell. Even, THAT'S not enough.
*sighs*
Anyway, it's not really, REALLY late. But I'm sleepy. Slept late last night completing some homework. And then woke up early. Plus, I want to go and find something to eat. (:
.jpg)
Outfit of the day. (: True you can't really see it. But oh, what the hell? Anyway....today was D-Day! *dun dun dun* Remember my mission? Well I succeeded! I think. Who knew Albert was such a camera shy guy? Anyway, sorry for the low quality of the picture (or rather, PERSON) because said person, refused to take a proper picture so I had to resort to my 'stalking' ways. (:
.jpg)
Yeah. Side profile of Albert's head! *laughs* He was checking out my watch. Look at the intent look on his face. (:Ohmygod....he is going to kill me when he sees this.
Oh! Hi Albert! Yeah, you told me not to take your picture. But I did. ^.^'
Don't kill me.
Nyahah! Okay, so I was being kinda mean. This was taken while we were putting on our shoes. Uhh...obviously ---->
I love his shoes. Dammit.
Anyway, he was talking to Prime and yeah, I pretended I was texting someone when of course, the camera was on. (:
Baizura told Albert I took his picture (when we went downstairs) and he shot me this look --> T.T
Hey! I would've asked nicely but YOU kept turning away. :P
Besides....it's for a great cause. Now Mel, Sand, Div, Sash and Mye would have something to imagine as I continue my rant about Albert. :)
So yeah, my day.....
Well, I woke up damn early cos my mum woke me up and told me that we were going to my Grandma's house. I was still half-asleep so I just nodded away like an extra for the show 'Noddy'. After a visit to my Grandmum's.....
Of course it was tuition time.
Miss Nirmala gave us an exam for maths and then for Science we were learning about excretion. Oh dammit. I really can't imagine what the class would be like when we're learning about reproduction. -.-'
Miss Nirmala told us that cancer is sort of inherited. Like if you're a girl, you'd inherit it from your dad's side (if any of his side had cancer before) but if you're a guy, you'd inherit it from your mum's side.
Apparently diabetic is also inherit-able. <--- was that even a real word?
So yeah, then Albert raised his hand and said, "Teacher, that means I'm really actually diabetic, I suffer from high colestrol and *I honestly forgot what the last one was*". Why I forgot? Because at that precise moment I burst out laughing. Not to offend Albert or anything okay. I wasn't laughing because of his condition. I think that's what most people thought. o.o
How lame. -.-'
I was laughing because the way he said it, he sounded like a 45 year old man trapped in a body of a 15 year old.
Yeah and then in History for some reason....we ended up talking about Sharlinie and Nurrin. And all these kids abduction. And why people are abducting people....and so on. It was kind of funny because when Albert brought Nurrin up, Mr. Sara was like, "Okay. How did we end up talking about this when we're suppose to talk about the Communist?"
Which was sort of true. And sort of sad. I mean, I don't know. I feel a twinge of sadness everytime someone talks about Nurrin. I guess it's because she was so young and so brutally murdered. -.-
I hope the person that committed the crime burns and dies in Hell. Even, THAT'S not enough.
*sighs*
Anyway, it's not really, REALLY late. But I'm sleepy. Slept late last night completing some homework. And then woke up early. Plus, I want to go and find something to eat. (:
Friday, 8 February 2008
Of Movie Reviews: Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Currently Listening To: 'Johanna' by The Soundtrack of Sweeney Todd The Demon Barber of Fleet Street.
Okay, I may not be qualified to do a reivew. But let's take it as an opinion. Right? Right.
Anyway....
Warning: Contains spoilers.
As the tagline says, 'Never Forget. Never Forgive.'
Truly, this movie is a work of art. From the screen writers, to Tim Burton's marvelous directing and of course not forgetting the brilliant actors and actresses. Bravo!
So! Moving on...
This movie certainly isn't for those of the weak hearted.....or weak stomach for that matter. Specially for those who can't stand the sight of blood. Though I have to admit, the intro graphics are amazing. When the blood pours from the paintings...
I would like to congratulate Johnny Depp on his amazing performance. It's truly remarkable how he is able to switch roles from being 'Captain Jack Sparrow' to 'Sweeney Todd' easily. As it is kind of obvious that these two roles are quite different from the other.
So the story begins with a barber, Benjamin Parker whom was sent to jail on a crime that he did not commit. 15 years later, he returns with a new name nevertheless, to London with Anthony Hope (Jamie Campbell Bower a.k.a. 'the gorgeous guy that captivated me since the beginning of the movie') a sailor and also a friend he had met at the seas. When Sweeney Todd a.k.a. Benjamin Parker returned, he had not only found that his wife had been poisonoed (allegedly) but his daughter held captive by Judge Turpin (Alan Rickman, YES, Prof. Snape from Harry Potter!). It was then did he join forces with Mrs. Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter, yes, Bellatrix Lestrange. Yes. From Harry Potter. Are you seeing a pattern here?). Together, I would like to say, they made quite the dynamic duo.
I would like to say their accents are amazing in this movie. Although half the time my concentration had been somewhere else everytime Anthony came on. It was quite romantic in a way, how he tried to save Johanna. Especially when he sang for her. Couldn't you make an impromptu for me? ;)
The ending was such a twist.....of course I did not expect it. I would quite like to tell you the ending but it gets kind of long and it's getting late PLUS I have not finished Nirmala homework yet. -.-'
The ending?
- The most twisted unsuspected murders.
In some ways, I loved the ending. It was romantic. (:
And that my dear friends, was the crappiest review I have ever given. *laughs* I swear, I had something in my head but then I got distracted by someone whom I thought was angry with me. But she's not! So I'm happy. :D
P/s: I think Jamie Campbell Bower should get the part of Tom Riddle. And OHMYGODIAMONDS he is so YUMMY.
Okay, I may not be qualified to do a reivew. But let's take it as an opinion. Right? Right.
Anyway....
Warning: Contains spoilers.
Sweeney Todd
The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
As the tagline says, 'Never Forget. Never Forgive.'
Truly, this movie is a work of art. From the screen writers, to Tim Burton's marvelous directing and of course not forgetting the brilliant actors and actresses. Bravo!
So! Moving on...
This movie certainly isn't for those of the weak hearted.....or weak stomach for that matter. Specially for those who can't stand the sight of blood. Though I have to admit, the intro graphics are amazing. When the blood pours from the paintings...
I would like to congratulate Johnny Depp on his amazing performance. It's truly remarkable how he is able to switch roles from being 'Captain Jack Sparrow' to 'Sweeney Todd' easily. As it is kind of obvious that these two roles are quite different from the other.
So the story begins with a barber, Benjamin Parker whom was sent to jail on a crime that he did not commit. 15 years later, he returns with a new name nevertheless, to London with Anthony Hope (Jamie Campbell Bower a.k.a. 'the gorgeous guy that captivated me since the beginning of the movie') a sailor and also a friend he had met at the seas. When Sweeney Todd a.k.a. Benjamin Parker returned, he had not only found that his wife had been poisonoed (allegedly) but his daughter held captive by Judge Turpin (Alan Rickman, YES, Prof. Snape from Harry Potter!). It was then did he join forces with Mrs. Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter, yes, Bellatrix Lestrange. Yes. From Harry Potter. Are you seeing a pattern here?). Together, I would like to say, they made quite the dynamic duo.
I would like to say their accents are amazing in this movie. Although half the time my concentration had been somewhere else everytime Anthony came on. It was quite romantic in a way, how he tried to save Johanna. Especially when he sang for her. Couldn't you make an impromptu for me? ;)
The ending was such a twist.....of course I did not expect it. I would quite like to tell you the ending but it gets kind of long and it's getting late PLUS I have not finished Nirmala homework yet. -.-'
The ending?
- The most twisted unsuspected murders.
In some ways, I loved the ending. It was romantic. (:
And that my dear friends, was the crappiest review I have ever given. *laughs* I swear, I had something in my head but then I got distracted by someone whom I thought was angry with me. But she's not! So I'm happy. :D
P/s: I think Jamie Campbell Bower should get the part of Tom Riddle. And OHMYGODIAMONDS he is so YUMMY.
I Can't Think of a Title =B
Currently: MySpacing, You Tube-ing, chatting to Rauf, Richard and Trish on WLM
Currently Listening To: 'Happy Birthday' by The Click Five
2nd post of the day. Yes, yes, yes. Bored. As usual. Was reading Megan's blog. I don't get the measuring thing. What? o.o
I'm talking to Trisher about Maula. She is addicted to the guy. Go Trish! If only I had the guts to ask Naveen for his email. But oh well. Nothing lost. I think. o.O
Richard is talking to me about how, "wishing for something can make it come true."
*wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish*
I can't tell you what it is or it won't come true. :P
Rauf is currently set to 'Away'. No idea where that boy went. I was listening to him play 'Welcome to The Black Parade' earlier. Seriously, his guitar skills. Are. Awesome. (:
I don't know what else to say. So I'm gonna post pictures! Resolution: Take more pictures.
I think I mentioned before somewhere that I like to take pictures of the sky. So yes. The snap shots.
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I think this was taken on my way home.
On the way to school. It was about 7 something in the morning.
Near by my house. It looks like it can be the cover of a CD. o.o
Currently Listening To: 'Happy Birthday' by The Click Five
2nd post of the day. Yes, yes, yes. Bored. As usual. Was reading Megan's blog. I don't get the measuring thing. What? o.o
I'm talking to Trisher about Maula. She is addicted to the guy. Go Trish! If only I had the guts to ask Naveen for his email. But oh well. Nothing lost. I think. o.O
Richard is talking to me about how, "wishing for something can make it come true."
*wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish wish*
I can't tell you what it is or it won't come true. :P
Rauf is currently set to 'Away'. No idea where that boy went. I was listening to him play 'Welcome to The Black Parade' earlier. Seriously, his guitar skills. Are. Awesome. (:
I don't know what else to say. So I'm gonna post pictures! Resolution: Take more pictures.
I think I mentioned before somewhere that I like to take pictures of the sky. So yes. The snap shots.
.jpg)
I think this was taken on my way home.
On the way to school. It was about 7 something in the morning.
Near by my house. It looks like it can be the cover of a CD. o.o
I just realized that I never posted a recent picture of me with braces. So here it is. Yeah, don't worry if you can't really see the braces. Apparently that's the point of my mum choosing that type of braces. Oh well. Either way, I don't mind. It still looks pretty cool.
Anyway, I'm gonna go off and finish my English Lit. homework that Pn. Chris gave us. (; See ya!
Don't Hang Up The Phone
Currently: YouTube-ing, MySpacing
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Anyway, I woke up.......early. o.o
As per usual, my parents can't stand it when I'm not up and annoying them with questions like, "Can I go to *insert friend's name*'s house?"
And they'd be like, "-.-'"
Yes. That face.
-.-'
What's the point of getting days off from school if you can't enjoy it? Oh yes! I know what they're for. Completing those shit loads of homework that the teachers assign to us.
Bloody hell.
I am currently pissed of at this stupid mat rempit loser on YouTube. Sure....I made a vlog on that entire subject. But you know what? It's coming from my opinions. Sorry for not being one of those girls who has cotton candy for brains and follow you 'drug addicts look-alike' everywhere on your stupid kapchais. <---- Google it for meaning.
Grrrrr.......
Wow. Look....I'm trembling in fear because of you're oh-so-amazing-'skills'-on-your-second-hand-kapchai. -.-'
I'll kick your ass all the way to Timbuktu before you're able to get that greasy hair out of your face.
Anyway, moving on from random losers on YouTube.....
Can't wait for tomorrow. Saturday. Tuition. Albert. =B
Ooooohhh....speaking of which....I need to finish that homework. Yes, yes....that Maths homework due tomorrow.
Not much to write now. Except, Sandra is in Tioman. I miss her. I miss Divya who is stuck in the house with her cousins. I miss Mel whom is sitting under the dining table. :P I think. I miss Myra who is stressing at home. I miss Sash who is eating smores in front of her computer. I miss Baizura who is now on the way to Taipeng.
I miss you readers that I've never met before (I mean, really. To the ones I've never met before). I miss you other readers who are from the same high school. The 'prestigious' Sri Aman. *cough cough*.
Mostly, I think I miss Albert.
LOL
Oh and yes. I miss Shazmeer to for some reason. o.o Noooo idea why.
Currently Listening To: 'Happy Birthday' by The Click Five *dedicated to Myra. Sorry.*
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I love this shirt. :D
Anyway, I woke up.......early. o.o
As per usual, my parents can't stand it when I'm not up and annoying them with questions like, "Can I go to *insert friend's name*'s house?"
And they'd be like, "-.-'"
Yes. That face.
-.-'
What's the point of getting days off from school if you can't enjoy it? Oh yes! I know what they're for. Completing those shit loads of homework that the teachers assign to us.
Bloody hell.
I am currently pissed of at this stupid mat rempit loser on YouTube. Sure....I made a vlog on that entire subject. But you know what? It's coming from my opinions. Sorry for not being one of those girls who has cotton candy for brains and follow you 'drug addicts look-alike' everywhere on your stupid kapchais. <---- Google it for meaning.
Grrrrr.......
Wow. Look....I'm trembling in fear because of you're oh-so-amazing-'skills'-on-your-second-hand-kapchai. -.-'
I'll kick your ass all the way to Timbuktu before you're able to get that greasy hair out of your face.
Anyway, moving on from random losers on YouTube.....
Can't wait for tomorrow. Saturday. Tuition. Albert. =B
Ooooohhh....speaking of which....I need to finish that homework. Yes, yes....that Maths homework due tomorrow.
Not much to write now. Except, Sandra is in Tioman. I miss her. I miss Divya who is stuck in the house with her cousins. I miss Mel whom is sitting under the dining table. :P I think. I miss Myra who is stressing at home. I miss Sash who is eating smores in front of her computer. I miss Baizura who is now on the way to Taipeng.
I miss you readers that I've never met before (I mean, really. To the ones I've never met before). I miss you other readers who are from the same high school. The 'prestigious' Sri Aman. *cough cough*.
Mostly, I think I miss Albert.
LOL
Oh and yes. I miss Shazmeer to for some reason. o.o Noooo idea why.
Dedicated to Myra:
'Yeah yeah woah woah
I know you hate me
yeah yeah woah woah
Well I miss you too
yeah yeah I know
I know its kinda late
But happy birthfriendship day
Its not that I don't care
you know I'll make it up to you
If I could I'd be there'
Thursday, 7 February 2008
Let Me Slip Away I'm Barely Holding On
Currently: MySpacing and texting Baizura
Currently Listening To: 'Weatherman' by +44
I should listen to Mel. It hurts when you're punching the wall. But she didn't mention the part that when you're crying.....it doesn't hurt as much.
Although now I can't feel my knuckles. Well unless someone hits my hand and then I would hiss in pain.
Well, as I have forgotten to post it in my earlier blog although I think it was pretty noticable. Myra and Sash couldn't come.
My mum was being annoying the entire day.
So basically, I stayed in bed the entire day just to avoid her. More or less I was drifting in and out of sleep.
When I finally emerged out of my room at about six something, the BBQ already began and everyone was like.....I dun't know. I felt like a tourist in my own home. More or less everyone was ignoring me. I sat there long enough to eat something so that I don't get gastric and then went upstairs once more. What's the point anyway?
I felt like a freaking shadow.
Alone and lost.
Even a shadow has it's companion.
I already feel that way every time it's recess.
I don't need to feel it during my supposed 'days off'.
Feeling alone and lost I meant.
So erm yeah.....not much to write about.
I just.....
I don't know....
I need to talk to someone.
I feel so naive.
It's like.....I keep going on and on about how we'd always be best friends forever and we'll always be there for each other. And yet, when I need someone the most.....no ones there. Pathetic isn't it?
Basically only Mark Hoppus's voice is keeping me company right now.
I don't understand it. I want to get good marks too. But I don't turn into a fucking zombie. I care about my grades. But I think if a friend needed me......I'd be there.
I hate myself.
Why do I care so much?
When it's obvious that the favour isn't going to be returned.
Currently Listening To: 'Weatherman' by +44
I should listen to Mel. It hurts when you're punching the wall. But she didn't mention the part that when you're crying.....it doesn't hurt as much.
Although now I can't feel my knuckles. Well unless someone hits my hand and then I would hiss in pain.
Well, as I have forgotten to post it in my earlier blog although I think it was pretty noticable. Myra and Sash couldn't come.
My mum was being annoying the entire day.
So basically, I stayed in bed the entire day just to avoid her. More or less I was drifting in and out of sleep.
When I finally emerged out of my room at about six something, the BBQ already began and everyone was like.....I dun't know. I felt like a tourist in my own home. More or less everyone was ignoring me. I sat there long enough to eat something so that I don't get gastric and then went upstairs once more. What's the point anyway?
I felt like a freaking shadow.
Alone and lost.
Even a shadow has it's companion.
I already feel that way every time it's recess.
I don't need to feel it during my supposed 'days off'.
Feeling alone and lost I meant.
So erm yeah.....not much to write about.
I just.....
I don't know....
I need to talk to someone.
I feel so naive.
It's like.....I keep going on and on about how we'd always be best friends forever and we'll always be there for each other. And yet, when I need someone the most.....no ones there. Pathetic isn't it?
Basically only Mark Hoppus's voice is keeping me company right now.
I don't understand it. I want to get good marks too. But I don't turn into a fucking zombie. I care about my grades. But I think if a friend needed me......I'd be there.
I hate myself.
Why do I care so much?
When it's obvious that the favour isn't going to be returned.
'Your heart is a grave to be perfectly honest
Your mouth's a smoking gun
And you smile while you're twisting the knife in my stomach
Until everything is gone
Take all you can from me
I've got weak constitution
I'm led so easily
So easily'
Drag The Memories Down The Hall
Currently: MySpacing and talking to Trisher and Chee Hoe on WLM
It's barely ten in the morning. *yawns* I should be in bed but for some reason, I can't sleep. -.-'
*sighs*
I am craving for the apple crumble from Starbucks like, right now. Yummm....
Sandra, are you still in KL? Or have you gone to Pulau Tioman already? Divya....Mel....what are you two up to?
So many questions.....no answers......yet.
Hmmm....I was just going through my MySpace friends and went browsing through one of my 'uncle's (I think he's an uncle. Or a second cousin. I have no idea what the relationship is, but he's family!) profile. I miss you la Hariz. The last time we saw each other was what? Last year Raya?
Has your hair grown yet? *poke poke*
The Palmolive shampoo model! :D
You're suppose to be in US. -.-' Remember to get me something! Muahahaha.....
My phone has been on silent. I really can't stand listening to anything right now except for the sound of me typing on the keyboard. It's like.....the most calming sound ever! Yes, I'm weird. It's been mentioned several times before. I'm not sure what my doctor thinks of it. He says it's a 'phase'. -.-
Note: Sarcasm gone wrong. I need to stop listening to Prime. The influence rubs off.
I can't wait for Saturday. At least I'll be learning something. And I'll be able to see some of my friends since the people I thought I could count on seems to disappear every time the school hols comes around. How awesome is that?
Or sad. Whichever you prefer.
GAH. It's the holidays people! HOLIDAYS....
Aren't we suppose to be having fun?
Ohmygod.....PMR is in October! O-C-T-O-B-E-R!
Breathe a little.
And like Latifah said, how is this as important as SPM? C'mon.....I know you people. Don't need to study can already get 7/8 A's.
You know, I should listen to Mel more often and not try punching the wall. My knuckles can't seem to bleed. It's like the Red Jumpsuit Appartus song, 'Face Down'.
Yeah, so true. Mine don't bleed. They just hurt a damn lot and turn raw red. I couldn't move my fingers this morning which freaked me out but then after a while it got better. (:
I was pissed last night okay? Nothing else to let my anger out on except the poor undemanding wall. I think I shall watch Sweeny Todd today. I'm sorry you guys but I would've waited but I think it'd be only after PMR would I get to see you outside of school.
I never thought I could hate three letters of the alphabet so much it makes me want to chuck my phone against the wall just to see something break (other than my knuckles). It is the most annoying thing the goverment could ever make. And you know what's shitty?
Is that like....six years (or something) years from now....there won't BE anymore PMR!
What the fuck is up with that?
We had to suffer through shit loads of stress until we're practically gagging with it and you're just going to let PMR cease to exist years from now? WHAT THE SHIT?!?!?!
No wonder the young generation of Malaysians are acting like total crap. See the things you put us through? And then act like 'it's all for your own good. Some day you will run the country-...' and bla bla bla. Excuse me? I think we can handle something like 'running the country' pretty well. Better than dealing with the pressure from you adults that is! It's like, pressure from right, left and centre. What the hell?
The school wants this year's batch of form 3's to get 100% for their PMR's. Just because last year's did. And oh....did I mention they just wanted to keep their reputation?
Then, the teachers are putting more pressure by mentioning PMR every single bloody lesson. Or using PMR as a threat. Like, "You shouldn't act like this you know. You're already grown up. Got PMR this year some more." and etc.
THEN, it's our parents. Apparently to them, if we don't study every single freaking minute of our lives until after PMR, we will fail the ruddy exams.
Conclusion: All teenage lives should be put on hold till after PMR exams to avoid frustration and the lethal growing of white hair due to large amounts of stress.
The disappearance of my friends? I swear to God it's like I'm starring in a movie where aliens are abducting my friends. Am I the only one who didn't know that I got the part? Geez....I feel like Mel Gibson.
It's barely ten in the morning. *yawns* I should be in bed but for some reason, I can't sleep. -.-'
*sighs*
I am craving for the apple crumble from Starbucks like, right now. Yummm....
Sandra, are you still in KL? Or have you gone to Pulau Tioman already? Divya....Mel....what are you two up to?
So many questions.....no answers......yet.
Hmmm....I was just going through my MySpace friends and went browsing through one of my 'uncle's (I think he's an uncle. Or a second cousin. I have no idea what the relationship is, but he's family!) profile. I miss you la Hariz. The last time we saw each other was what? Last year Raya?
Has your hair grown yet? *poke poke*
The Palmolive shampoo model! :D
You're suppose to be in US. -.-' Remember to get me something! Muahahaha.....
My phone has been on silent. I really can't stand listening to anything right now except for the sound of me typing on the keyboard. It's like.....the most calming sound ever! Yes, I'm weird. It's been mentioned several times before. I'm not sure what my doctor thinks of it. He says it's a 'phase'. -.-
Note: Sarcasm gone wrong. I need to stop listening to Prime. The influence rubs off.
I can't wait for Saturday. At least I'll be learning something. And I'll be able to see some of my friends since the people I thought I could count on seems to disappear every time the school hols comes around. How awesome is that?
Or sad. Whichever you prefer.
GAH. It's the holidays people! HOLIDAYS....
Aren't we suppose to be having fun?
Ohmygod.....PMR is in October! O-C-T-O-B-E-R!
Breathe a little.
And like Latifah said, how is this as important as SPM? C'mon.....I know you people. Don't need to study can already get 7/8 A's.
You know, I should listen to Mel more often and not try punching the wall. My knuckles can't seem to bleed. It's like the Red Jumpsuit Appartus song, 'Face Down'.
'These knuckles break before they bleed.'
Yeah, so true. Mine don't bleed. They just hurt a damn lot and turn raw red. I couldn't move my fingers this morning which freaked me out but then after a while it got better. (:
I was pissed last night okay? Nothing else to let my anger out on except the poor undemanding wall. I think I shall watch Sweeny Todd today. I'm sorry you guys but I would've waited but I think it'd be only after PMR would I get to see you outside of school.
P-M-R
I never thought I could hate three letters of the alphabet so much it makes me want to chuck my phone against the wall just to see something break (other than my knuckles). It is the most annoying thing the goverment could ever make. And you know what's shitty?
Is that like....six years (or something) years from now....there won't BE anymore PMR!
What the fuck is up with that?
We had to suffer through shit loads of stress until we're practically gagging with it and you're just going to let PMR cease to exist years from now? WHAT THE SHIT?!?!?!
No wonder the young generation of Malaysians are acting like total crap. See the things you put us through? And then act like 'it's all for your own good. Some day you will run the country-...' and bla bla bla. Excuse me? I think we can handle something like 'running the country' pretty well. Better than dealing with the pressure from you adults that is! It's like, pressure from right, left and centre. What the hell?
The school wants this year's batch of form 3's to get 100% for their PMR's. Just because last year's did. And oh....did I mention they just wanted to keep their reputation?
Then, the teachers are putting more pressure by mentioning PMR every single bloody lesson. Or using PMR as a threat. Like, "You shouldn't act like this you know. You're already grown up. Got PMR this year some more." and etc.
THEN, it's our parents. Apparently to them, if we don't study every single freaking minute of our lives until after PMR, we will fail the ruddy exams.
Conclusion: All teenage lives should be put on hold till after PMR exams to avoid frustration and the lethal growing of white hair due to large amounts of stress.
The disappearance of my friends? I swear to God it's like I'm starring in a movie where aliens are abducting my friends. Am I the only one who didn't know that I got the part? Geez....I feel like Mel Gibson.
I have never felt lonelier.
Wednesday, 6 February 2008
Brown Nose the Pirate
Currently Listening To: '3's & 7's' by Queens of Stone Age
Currently: Chatting on WLM to Sash, Mel, Sand and Chee Hoe.
Sash is telling me about this dude she saw on American Idol today who sang 'Don't Stop Me Now' by Queens.
Personally, I shall stick to McFly.
Anyway, woke up late today *obviously*. First day of hols and my future seemed bleak. I had a dentist appointment today to put on the anchors for my braces. Divya said I'm wearing braces, not building a ship. Why do I need anchors for?
Smart person la you Div.
Ha ha ha.....she's gonna be getting her's on March. :P
I can see this red thing under the page that says 'Could Not Contact Blogger.com'. Oh and yes, the spell checking thing is not working so don't mind if there are little errors sometimes. I hate spelling mistakes but I tend to do them anyway. -.-'
Hmmmm....
Nothing much happened today. Once I got home, I just went straight to bed despite the fact that it was only six something.
Now I'm wide awake.
I'm re-reading Harry Potter books at randomly. One time I'm reading Deathly Hallows. The next it's Half-Blood Prince. And now it's Order of The Phoenix.
My mum is having a BBQ tomorrow. Hopefully Sash and Mye can attend. Was thinking of having a sleepover.
I am just stating every other random thing in my head right now.
Can't wait for Saturday.
Miss Nirmala's tuition.
Get to see Albert and also get to listen to 'sarcasm gone wrong' by Prime.
Hmmm.....I actually like form 3 topics. It's a hell lot easier than form 2 for some reason. o.o
What is wrong with me?
Geez....
I am now telling Sash that her alter ego is 'Darth Cooker'. Yeah, Sash likes to cook and one day when we were cooking something, we were talking about Tom's obsession with Star Wars and that's how Darth Cooker was born. I think.
Me and Mel are talking about how she is attracted to cuts. I mean....cuts are attracted to her. o.o
Cut magnet.
Shazmeer is online. o.o
I miss listening to his voice. Ha ha ha ha. That sounds wrongs for some reason. I miss Living Classrooms. -.-'
But I don't think I'll go for the course again. Not sure if I can cope with the stress of having to write a story in what? Four days.
No.
Thank.
You.
Wheee....short post for today. Will update when I have any other random thing to say.
*aum*
Still hoping that Myra and Sash says 'yes' to tomorrow.
I feel like a guy who just asked a popular girl out.
-.-'
WTF...???
Currently: Chatting on WLM to Sash, Mel, Sand and Chee Hoe.
Sash is telling me about this dude she saw on American Idol today who sang 'Don't Stop Me Now' by Queens.
Personally, I shall stick to McFly.
Anyway, woke up late today *obviously*. First day of hols and my future seemed bleak. I had a dentist appointment today to put on the anchors for my braces. Divya said I'm wearing braces, not building a ship. Why do I need anchors for?
Smart person la you Div.
Ha ha ha.....she's gonna be getting her's on March. :P
I can see this red thing under the page that says 'Could Not Contact Blogger.com'. Oh and yes, the spell checking thing is not working so don't mind if there are little errors sometimes. I hate spelling mistakes but I tend to do them anyway. -.-'
Hmmmm....
Nothing much happened today. Once I got home, I just went straight to bed despite the fact that it was only six something.
Now I'm wide awake.
I'm re-reading Harry Potter books at randomly. One time I'm reading Deathly Hallows. The next it's Half-Blood Prince. And now it's Order of The Phoenix.
My mum is having a BBQ tomorrow. Hopefully Sash and Mye can attend. Was thinking of having a sleepover.
I am just stating every other random thing in my head right now.
Can't wait for Saturday.
Miss Nirmala's tuition.
Get to see Albert and also get to listen to 'sarcasm gone wrong' by Prime.
Hmmm.....I actually like form 3 topics. It's a hell lot easier than form 2 for some reason. o.o
What is wrong with me?
Geez....
I am now telling Sash that her alter ego is 'Darth Cooker'. Yeah, Sash likes to cook and one day when we were cooking something, we were talking about Tom's obsession with Star Wars and that's how Darth Cooker was born. I think.
Me and Mel are talking about how she is attracted to cuts. I mean....cuts are attracted to her. o.o
Cut magnet.
Shazmeer is online. o.o
I miss listening to his voice. Ha ha ha ha. That sounds wrongs for some reason. I miss Living Classrooms. -.-'
But I don't think I'll go for the course again. Not sure if I can cope with the stress of having to write a story in what? Four days.
No.
Thank.
You.
Wheee....short post for today. Will update when I have any other random thing to say.
*aum*
Still hoping that Myra and Sash says 'yes' to tomorrow.
I feel like a guy who just asked a popular girl out.
-.-'
WTF...???
Tuesday, 5 February 2008
iTimeBomb
Currently: Chatting on WLM with Sash, Mira and Trisher.
Tuesday.
The last day of school before Chinese New Year holidays! I would like to take this time to say Happy Chinese New Year to Sandra, Melissa, Trisher, Peige and anyone else whom I know that is celebrating this holiday. Of course this includes all my darling readers. (:
Today I woke up feeling extremely tired. I just realized how damn cold the tiles on my floor can be after a night of having the AC on.
Note to self: Next time shopping, get those cute fuzzy bedroom slippers.
RIGHT!
Myra was late today. I thought she wasn't coming and I began to feel lost. :
Trisher didn't come either today so I was like.....haaaaaah?
But luckily Myra came when we were in the Science lab.
Me: *sleepy face*
*Myra walks into the Science Lab*
Me: MYRA!!!
Myra: *smiles*
The morning went on like that.....I was half-asleep during Science. I almost fell off my chair. Erm...then in English, Pn. Chris asked us to do this project thing, where we have to raise funds for an orphanage or a donation centre. WHICH REMINDS ME!
I need to find out more about Comic Relief. (:
Yes, the donation of my choice. Oooohhh yeeeahhh....
Spent recess with Sand. Mostly. Mel didn't come. And Divya was too popular for her own good. As per usual. Erm yeah.....was acting all emo in the canteen. I couldn't get yesterday's incident out of my mind. It's so annoying. -.-
This is what happens la you dumb, dumb juniors. You want me to die of anxiety attack ah? *insert my famous Chinese slang* Already worrying about PMR.....some more need to worry about you dumb ass people. Stupid sheeeeeeiiiit.
This PMS-ing teacher came into my class after recess. It was kinda crappy since she was ordering us around like we have shit for brains and yeah.....
Let's just say, I think about 99% of the class wanted to kill her.
Cik Tan is no longer going to be my History teacher! :(
ohmygod.....Pn. Marie is going to be our new Science teacher! Seriously, I should watch what I say more often. I know I said that I would love it if Pn. Marie could teach us Science but I didn't want it to literally happen. o.o
And now I shall be her AJK.
Wow.
I'm..........scared?
Nah, just nervous. Well, I'll get used to it. I hope.
My cat, Pheobe, is sitting in my lap looking at me with a look that says, 'what the Hell are you doing? Why aren't you scratching my ears?'.
Speaking of cats, Sash says that her two cats might be mating. And I'm like, "WTF?"
Since I thought they were brothers and sisters. But Sash said they were more like, 'step brother and step sister'. -.-'
Same difference, Sash!
Well basically, after History we didn't learn anything since they still haven't replaced our BM teacher. Pn. Chris came again for last period to relief. And yeah....she gave us some English homework. I was damn bored that I actually did her work.
*gasps*
Oh well, one less homework to tick off during the holidays.
After school, went to Bai's house. We spent the afternoon on her PlayStation 2. We were playing Everybody's Tennis. That stupid game la. I hate this dude, his name is....erm.....Bull Rock! Yeah.....who knew 'rocks' could play tennis?
And some more he can receive smashes!
-.-'
Grrrr....
Anyone who knows how to defeat him.....please, please, please teach me!
Then we switched to Guitar Heroes III. :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
I am so so so so so so so so SO in love with the Xplorer. (:
I like Casey Lynch. I always pick her. Despite her lack of erm........well, if you played the game, you'll know. (;
I suck at the song 'Knights of Cydonia' by Muse and 'Cult of Personality' by Living Colour.
-.-'
ohmygod....and I was just playing medium and I failed those songs! Shitty.
Almost lost in 'Black Magic Woman' by Santana but I made it!
Ngahaha....
Me and Bai were doing co-op career so yeah.
OHMYGODIAMOND!!!!!
I love, love, LOVE playing 'Same Old Song Same Old Dance' by Aerosmith, 'Cities on Flame with Rock and Roll' by Blue Oyster Cult (encore), '3's & 7's' by Queens of the Stone Age, 'The Metal' by Tenacious D and 'Helicopter' by Bloc Party (encore).
Yes, yes, yes. I'm an addict. Guitar Heroes III and Dougie Poynter are my drugs. (:
Tuesday.
The last day of school before Chinese New Year holidays! I would like to take this time to say Happy Chinese New Year to Sandra, Melissa, Trisher, Peige and anyone else whom I know that is celebrating this holiday. Of course this includes all my darling readers. (:
Today I woke up feeling extremely tired. I just realized how damn cold the tiles on my floor can be after a night of having the AC on.
Note to self: Next time shopping, get those cute fuzzy bedroom slippers.
RIGHT!
Myra was late today. I thought she wasn't coming and I began to feel lost. :
Trisher didn't come either today so I was like.....haaaaaah?
But luckily Myra came when we were in the Science lab.
Me: *sleepy face*
*Myra walks into the Science Lab*
Me: MYRA!!!
Myra: *smiles*
The morning went on like that.....I was half-asleep during Science. I almost fell off my chair. Erm...then in English, Pn. Chris asked us to do this project thing, where we have to raise funds for an orphanage or a donation centre. WHICH REMINDS ME!
I need to find out more about Comic Relief. (:
Yes, the donation of my choice. Oooohhh yeeeahhh....
Spent recess with Sand. Mostly. Mel didn't come. And Divya was too popular for her own good. As per usual. Erm yeah.....was acting all emo in the canteen. I couldn't get yesterday's incident out of my mind. It's so annoying. -.-
This is what happens la you dumb, dumb juniors. You want me to die of anxiety attack ah? *insert my famous Chinese slang* Already worrying about PMR.....some more need to worry about you dumb ass people. Stupid sheeeeeeiiiit.
This PMS-ing teacher came into my class after recess. It was kinda crappy since she was ordering us around like we have shit for brains and yeah.....
Let's just say, I think about 99% of the class wanted to kill her.
Cik Tan is no longer going to be my History teacher! :(
ohmygod.....Pn. Marie is going to be our new Science teacher! Seriously, I should watch what I say more often. I know I said that I would love it if Pn. Marie could teach us Science but I didn't want it to literally happen. o.o
And now I shall be her AJK.
Wow.
I'm..........scared?
Nah, just nervous. Well, I'll get used to it. I hope.
My cat, Pheobe, is sitting in my lap looking at me with a look that says, 'what the Hell are you doing? Why aren't you scratching my ears?'.
Speaking of cats, Sash says that her two cats might be mating. And I'm like, "WTF?"
Since I thought they were brothers and sisters. But Sash said they were more like, 'step brother and step sister'. -.-'
Same difference, Sash!
Well basically, after History we didn't learn anything since they still haven't replaced our BM teacher. Pn. Chris came again for last period to relief. And yeah....she gave us some English homework. I was damn bored that I actually did her work.
*gasps*
Oh well, one less homework to tick off during the holidays.
After school, went to Bai's house. We spent the afternoon on her PlayStation 2. We were playing Everybody's Tennis. That stupid game la. I hate this dude, his name is....erm.....Bull Rock! Yeah.....who knew 'rocks' could play tennis?
And some more he can receive smashes!
-.-'
Grrrr....
Anyone who knows how to defeat him.....please, please, please teach me!
Then we switched to Guitar Heroes III. :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D
I am so so so so so so so so SO in love with the Xplorer. (:
I like Casey Lynch. I always pick her. Despite her lack of erm........well, if you played the game, you'll know. (;
I suck at the song 'Knights of Cydonia' by Muse and 'Cult of Personality' by Living Colour.
-.-'
ohmygod....and I was just playing medium and I failed those songs! Shitty.
Almost lost in 'Black Magic Woman' by Santana but I made it!
Ngahaha....
Me and Bai were doing co-op career so yeah.
OHMYGODIAMOND!!!!!
I love, love, LOVE playing 'Same Old Song Same Old Dance' by Aerosmith, 'Cities on Flame with Rock and Roll' by Blue Oyster Cult (encore), '3's & 7's' by Queens of the Stone Age, 'The Metal' by Tenacious D and 'Helicopter' by Bloc Party (encore).
Yes, yes, yes. I'm an addict. Guitar Heroes III and Dougie Poynter are my drugs. (:
Monday, 4 February 2008
Kissing Your Lips At Midnight
Currently Listening To: 'Stockholm Syndrome' by Blink 182
Monday.
As per usual, to my readers, you know how much I despise Mondays. It's not because it's the start of a new week, when technically.....the start of the week is Sunday. It's just because we have to wake up extra early because of morning FORMAL assembly. I hate grouping together in large amounts.
It's frustrating. But like our great leader, Nahjan, says, it's so ugghh but we still have to go through it. At then end of the day, we manage somehow.
Even if it's just barely, eh?
So anyway, the one reason I dragged myself to school today was mainly because someone told me that the first ever Sri Aman bulletin was going to be released today. Sure, sometimes I'm not really a big fan of these things. But this time, I actually sent something in and it will be my first time in print.
*jumps around squealing like a girl that has just had her first candy*
*back to normal*
And so....I was squeezing Sandra's hand excitedly when Nahjan announced it officially during the assembly today and then wen't, "OH MY GOD!"
Because Pn. Alainal was going to read my story. -.-'
So erm yeah....
I was pretty excited and happy but when I got to class, it was like.....the death of Kermit the Frog or something because everyone was so gloomy and nyyyaaahhh....
I know it was still morning and everyone probably isn't half-awake yet. But I was kinda disappointed when Myra was....
Yeah.
I dunno.
I'm not blaming her.
But that was a pretty nice way to burst my bubble.
Oh well, I knew it wasn't going to last anyway.
I wonder what's bugging Myra though....
Currently Listening To: 'Asthenia' by Blink 182
Rest of the day proceeded uneventfully. I'm guessing Sash didn't come because I didn't see her. I miss her.
I didn't see Div either.
She didn't come.
Wonder where all you people went.
Mel and Sand cheered me up slightly during recess but recess only lasts 30 minutes. What about the rest of the hours in school?
I felt praticularly numb in Maths.
For some reason, I just don't understand the teacher. I mean, I get what she's talking about and things. But then again, I still don't understand. And when she asks, "Who don't understand? Please raise up their hands."
It's not like I can raise my hand because to begin with.....I don't know what I don't understand. I just don't understand it.
Did that make sense?
I felt so stupid back there in class. I was like.....DOOOOOOHHHH....
-.-'
Spent my afternoon trying to think up of a sequel for Friendship Bracelet (the story that I had published). But then when I talked to my mum on the way home later on in the evening, she told me not to make one. She says that people who are usually chosen for 'Pick of The Month' don't write sequels.
I see what she means.
There's no point of me writing anyway.
Not if.....
Well, I shouldn't say it here.
My blog is being really publicised at the moment. o.o
Thanks by the way, but it kinda makes my writing a bit constricted.
Oh well....
I can't wait for tuition this Saturday. Mainly because I'll get to see Albert again and I think I deserve a couple of laughs. Even if it lasts for a while. Tomorrow is the last day of school before the holidays. I ain't going anywhere. As per usual. I'll spend most of my days just.......thinking.
I know I shouldn't.
Not with the things in my mind.
But I just need to.
Then again......I don't need the extra pain.
Do I?
I'm confused.
*a few minutes later*
You know what?
I'm so pissed right now. I'm talking to Mira. One of my 'daughters'. And like, her friends who like Dougie went and called me a bitch and said Dougie was their's.
-.-'
*ahem*
Hello?
Dougie belongs to no one.
Shut the fuck up.
Besides, it was just a story. GOD!
You know what I'd like to say to you juniors?
If Dougie ever met with an accident. Hypothetically speaking. And his looks were beyoned repair....and he couldn't even remember your name. Would you stay by his side? Or run in the direction of the next 'cutest' guy?
Cos I'm not like that. I'm not like you people who just pretends and then goes off after six months.
It's been five years since I first fell for Dougie.
I think that counts for something.
So please, don't go calling people 'bitch' without knowing the facts, BITCH!!
Grrrr.....
Monday.
As per usual, to my readers, you know how much I despise Mondays. It's not because it's the start of a new week, when technically.....the start of the week is Sunday. It's just because we have to wake up extra early because of morning FORMAL assembly. I hate grouping together in large amounts.
It's frustrating. But like our great leader, Nahjan, says, it's so ugghh but we still have to go through it. At then end of the day, we manage somehow.
Even if it's just barely, eh?
So anyway, the one reason I dragged myself to school today was mainly because someone told me that the first ever Sri Aman bulletin was going to be released today. Sure, sometimes I'm not really a big fan of these things. But this time, I actually sent something in and it will be my first time in print.
*jumps around squealing like a girl that has just had her first candy*
*back to normal*
And so....I was squeezing Sandra's hand excitedly when Nahjan announced it officially during the assembly today and then wen't, "OH MY GOD!"
Because Pn. Alainal was going to read my story. -.-'
So erm yeah....
I was pretty excited and happy but when I got to class, it was like.....the death of Kermit the Frog or something because everyone was so gloomy and nyyyaaahhh....
I know it was still morning and everyone probably isn't half-awake yet. But I was kinda disappointed when Myra was....
Yeah.
I dunno.
I'm not blaming her.
But that was a pretty nice way to burst my bubble.
Oh well, I knew it wasn't going to last anyway.
I wonder what's bugging Myra though....
Currently Listening To: 'Asthenia' by Blink 182
Rest of the day proceeded uneventfully. I'm guessing Sash didn't come because I didn't see her. I miss her.
I didn't see Div either.
She didn't come.
Wonder where all you people went.
Mel and Sand cheered me up slightly during recess but recess only lasts 30 minutes. What about the rest of the hours in school?
I felt praticularly numb in Maths.
For some reason, I just don't understand the teacher. I mean, I get what she's talking about and things. But then again, I still don't understand. And when she asks, "Who don't understand? Please raise up their hands."
It's not like I can raise my hand because to begin with.....I don't know what I don't understand. I just don't understand it.
Did that make sense?
I felt so stupid back there in class. I was like.....DOOOOOOHHHH....
-.-'
Spent my afternoon trying to think up of a sequel for Friendship Bracelet (the story that I had published). But then when I talked to my mum on the way home later on in the evening, she told me not to make one. She says that people who are usually chosen for 'Pick of The Month' don't write sequels.
I see what she means.
There's no point of me writing anyway.
Not if.....
Well, I shouldn't say it here.
My blog is being really publicised at the moment. o.o
Thanks by the way, but it kinda makes my writing a bit constricted.
Oh well....
I can't wait for tuition this Saturday. Mainly because I'll get to see Albert again and I think I deserve a couple of laughs. Even if it lasts for a while. Tomorrow is the last day of school before the holidays. I ain't going anywhere. As per usual. I'll spend most of my days just.......thinking.
I know I shouldn't.
Not with the things in my mind.
But I just need to.
Then again......I don't need the extra pain.
Do I?
I'm confused.
*a few minutes later*
You know what?
I'm so pissed right now. I'm talking to Mira. One of my 'daughters'. And like, her friends who like Dougie went and called me a bitch and said Dougie was their's.
-.-'
*ahem*
Hello?
Dougie belongs to no one.
Shut the fuck up.
Besides, it was just a story. GOD!
You know what I'd like to say to you juniors?
If Dougie ever met with an accident. Hypothetically speaking. And his looks were beyoned repair....and he couldn't even remember your name. Would you stay by his side? Or run in the direction of the next 'cutest' guy?
Cos I'm not like that. I'm not like you people who just pretends and then goes off after six months.
It's been five years since I first fell for Dougie.
I think that counts for something.
So please, don't go calling people 'bitch' without knowing the facts, BITCH!!
Grrrr.....
My head is made up of memories
Most of them useless delusions
This room is bored of rehearsal
And sick of the boundaries
I miss you so much
Should I go back should I go back should I...
I feel alone and tired
Should I go back should I go back should I...
This time I don't want to
Should I go back should I go back should I...
I feel alone and tired
Should I go back should I go back should I...
I hope I won't forget you.
Word of Caution to girls who acted like that today: I would love to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass. So shut the fuck up. Thank you.
Sunday, 3 February 2008
I'd never run her over, I wouldn't want to dent my car
So it begins....
It's that time of day again where I login to my Blog and bitch about the things that are happening with my life.
Saturday
I woke up at 5.30am in the morning because with the new braces, I need to spend a little more extra time brushing my goddamned teeth. Then spent some time looking for Assunta High School where the Interact Probationers seminar was going to be held. I, unlike most people in Sri Aman do not live in the area so I have no idea where the hell that friggin' school was. Well, luckily I found it in the end.
Erm....then I spent the morning hanging out with Trisher for a couple of moments and then we all had to separate according to group colours. Unfortunately for me, I got pink. =S
But my group was pretty okay. The Interactors were funny. And some of the probies too. There was this guy in my group whom reminded me of Rauf. It's just the way he looks. Which made me sad. Cos I still kinda miss him. Rauf, I meant. Not that dude that I met.
Yeah, the seminar was fun.
I know that was lame but I'm just trying to give a short description. I would like to say that Assunta is bigger than Sri Aman but Sri Aman is lot more practical. Both schools are pretty though. :)
Anyway, after that I had tuition. I was looking pretty beaten up when I finally got into class. We'll call it, lack of sleep + up all morning.
Erm.....Maths and Science was okay. Albert scared the freak out of me for some reason. He just suddenly nudged me out of no where when I was looking down at my paper and yeah....
He told me he's gonna be dropping out of Geo. -.-'
How could you leave us like that Albert?!?!
Oh, I was reading Myra's blog earlier. Yeah, Mye, that Albert could be your Albert too. And I think the dude in your tuition.....his name is Joel. Ask him if he knows Melissa Koay. If he does....then yeah, his name is Joel. *laughs* What a great explanation.
Night came.....went online....talked to Bai on the phone for a while. I fell asleep a number of times. And suddenly said some random things that made Baizura go, "HUH?"
Erm yeah....that was pretty much it.
I fell asleep with the lights on.
I woke up to the sound of Dougie singing from my phone.
Sunday
Currently Listening To: 'I Don't Wanna Know' by New Found Glory.
Woke up with dread. Have not finished my school homework and I have Geography tuition today. I hate the teacher.
Ohmygod, he bores me to death.
But I'm giving Miss Nirmala a chance to replace him. She did say to bear with her. The fastest she would replace him would be today, if not then by next week.
*sighs*
You have my extreme loyalty to you Miss Nirmala. No worries. But it doesn't mean I won't like it in Geo.
My family went out to Jusco for god knows what. I hope my mum buys lunch for me. With braces, it's kinda hard to eat and not feel the pain. But right now.....I really don't care.
Okay, so I know I might be a self-proclaimed huge Dougie fan. But I know I am. Probably there is someone out there who is a bigger Dougie fan. Perhaps in the world. But not in Malaysia. Never in Malaysia. So yes, I haven't been checking up on Dougiefied in a really long time. Nor do I really read Dougie-Poynter.com anymore. I do, but these days, I get such a limited time on the computer, I usually just do whatever I need to do and then I'm gone.
So what does any of this have anything to do with the pain that I am willing to go through if it means I can ignore this other pain in my heart?
I guess it's because I just found out that the rumour of Dougie's girlfriend is like, seriously, SERIOUSLY damn true.
*sits and watches as everything I used to know falls apart*
I don't think I'll ever be like Myra. I'm not strong enough like her, to be happy for Tom and Giovanna. I know, I know, if I truly cared about Dougie. Then I'd want him to be happy. Even if it's not with me.
But I'm only human.
And I'm only a teenage girl with a tendency to attract guys who only hurts her.
What else do you want me to do?
*sighs*
I know being sad over something like this is pathetic. He never even belonged to me in the first place. He belonged to the world. Well not really, he doesn't belong to anyone. He's a celebrity. Why would he want to date some teenage loser who wears braces, glasses and a fucking tudung because she's forced to, when there's some other hot sexy lady out there?
I can't feel my legs. I should really do something about the bleeding. But right now, I just don't care. I should listen to my dad and cut my nails. But Dad......at least when I have long nails, I don't have to resort using a blade.
It's that time of day again where I login to my Blog and bitch about the things that are happening with my life.
Saturday
I woke up at 5.30am in the morning because with the new braces, I need to spend a little more extra time brushing my goddamned teeth. Then spent some time looking for Assunta High School where the Interact Probationers seminar was going to be held. I, unlike most people in Sri Aman do not live in the area so I have no idea where the hell that friggin' school was. Well, luckily I found it in the end.
Erm....then I spent the morning hanging out with Trisher for a couple of moments and then we all had to separate according to group colours. Unfortunately for me, I got pink. =S
But my group was pretty okay. The Interactors were funny. And some of the probies too. There was this guy in my group whom reminded me of Rauf. It's just the way he looks. Which made me sad. Cos I still kinda miss him. Rauf, I meant. Not that dude that I met.
Yeah, the seminar was fun.
I know that was lame but I'm just trying to give a short description. I would like to say that Assunta is bigger than Sri Aman but Sri Aman is lot more practical. Both schools are pretty though. :)
Anyway, after that I had tuition. I was looking pretty beaten up when I finally got into class. We'll call it, lack of sleep + up all morning.
Erm.....Maths and Science was okay. Albert scared the freak out of me for some reason. He just suddenly nudged me out of no where when I was looking down at my paper and yeah....
He told me he's gonna be dropping out of Geo. -.-'
How could you leave us like that Albert?!?!
Oh, I was reading Myra's blog earlier. Yeah, Mye, that Albert could be your Albert too. And I think the dude in your tuition.....his name is Joel. Ask him if he knows Melissa Koay. If he does....then yeah, his name is Joel. *laughs* What a great explanation.
Night came.....went online....talked to Bai on the phone for a while. I fell asleep a number of times. And suddenly said some random things that made Baizura go, "HUH?"
Erm yeah....that was pretty much it.
I fell asleep with the lights on.
I woke up to the sound of Dougie singing from my phone.
Sunday
Currently Listening To: 'I Don't Wanna Know' by New Found Glory.
Woke up with dread. Have not finished my school homework and I have Geography tuition today. I hate the teacher.
Ohmygod, he bores me to death.
But I'm giving Miss Nirmala a chance to replace him. She did say to bear with her. The fastest she would replace him would be today, if not then by next week.
*sighs*
You have my extreme loyalty to you Miss Nirmala. No worries. But it doesn't mean I won't like it in Geo.
My family went out to Jusco for god knows what. I hope my mum buys lunch for me. With braces, it's kinda hard to eat and not feel the pain. But right now.....I really don't care.
Okay, so I know I might be a self-proclaimed huge Dougie fan. But I know I am. Probably there is someone out there who is a bigger Dougie fan. Perhaps in the world. But not in Malaysia. Never in Malaysia. So yes, I haven't been checking up on Dougiefied in a really long time. Nor do I really read Dougie-Poynter.com anymore. I do, but these days, I get such a limited time on the computer, I usually just do whatever I need to do and then I'm gone.
So what does any of this have anything to do with the pain that I am willing to go through if it means I can ignore this other pain in my heart?
I guess it's because I just found out that the rumour of Dougie's girlfriend is like, seriously, SERIOUSLY damn true.
*sits and watches as everything I used to know falls apart*
I don't think I'll ever be like Myra. I'm not strong enough like her, to be happy for Tom and Giovanna. I know, I know, if I truly cared about Dougie. Then I'd want him to be happy. Even if it's not with me.
But I'm only human.
And I'm only a teenage girl with a tendency to attract guys who only hurts her.
What else do you want me to do?
*sighs*
I know being sad over something like this is pathetic. He never even belonged to me in the first place. He belonged to the world. Well not really, he doesn't belong to anyone. He's a celebrity. Why would he want to date some teenage loser who wears braces, glasses and a fucking tudung because she's forced to, when there's some other hot sexy lady out there?
I can't feel my legs. I should really do something about the bleeding. But right now, I just don't care. I should listen to my dad and cut my nails. But Dad......at least when I have long nails, I don't have to resort using a blade.
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